29



I am just
A Wanderer with a thought
Nothing’s magnificent about it
I throw out my prose at people
Hoping to find someone who might tag along
It gets lonely walking all alone
With the burden of words
Meant for someone
Thrown around to everyone
In dire hopes that someone
Might just accompany me
On this wild, drug infested goose chase

Maybe I have more words with me
Than I could ever imagine
The way I cough them out
Like the blood
I threw up
Over the weekend
But then again
They are never meant for someone
Anyone
Are they?

With the desk lamp glowing dim
With every yank of paper from scribbled notebook
Crumpled up and thrown with other rejects
Slaying myself over the perfect piece
To win you over
You might think they’re just words I wrote up
I do that a lot, write stuff up
But it’s pretty different this time
I never sought perfection before
And now, I only want the best for you

But let’s be honest
I’m not magnificent
I’m not that lucky
I’m just a wanderer with a thought
Trying to settle down
Write for you
Just you
"Because I know no man is an island
And I can’t keep you back"

But you don’t want that
No one wants that
Maybe it’s my anxieties
Is there something on my face?
Maybe it’s just me
Maybe I fall for all the wrong people
Maybe their flaws make me love them more
Maybe I was never meant to love
Some people are never meant to love

I tell myself again and again
I was better off as a teenager who
Used to go through his mother’s medicine cabinet
Pull out a few Xanax and leave a sorry note behind
21 and still consuming Xanax’s
Yes the doctor prescribed them – 4 years ago, I think
Why do I still swallow pills without a care?
Because I’m just a wanderer with a thought
I’ll fade away with my words
Tucked in safely inside my collar

And maybe one day
I’ll give you a binder
With all my pieces
Looped with a frayed knot
Arranged in a mess
Maybe I’ll get to see you smile
After the longest of time
Maybe I’ll get to hug you
After the longest of time
Maybe you’ll throw the binder
Away from both of our reach

Maybe this is how I’ll know
My writing’s worth
But what do I know
I’m just a wanderer with a thought
Writing my heart out
On parchment, collected
Read
Kissed
Saved
The binder
Under your bed
Your favorite bedtime read
Or maybe
The source of the fire
In your living room fire place

But I’ll write
Till the sun fades away
Kissing the sky
Leaving it blushing
In shades of red
Violet
Vanilla twilight
And the moonlight masks us all
I’ll still write
For you
Because I relish in being forgotten
Being lost into the oblivion.


Post a Comment Blogger 29

  1. You are such a charmer soul with a word :-) .. Heartbreakingly beautiful <3

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    1. Thank you saumya :) I'm glad you liked it that much :) keep visiting !

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  2. Too romantic. :) Very well penned.

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  3. That's a passionate writer here! Lovely lines :)

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  4. this is so awesome.. lovely flow of words from you as usual.. charmer!!
    i m gonna read it one more time :)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you meera :) .. it really feels great that you felt it reading second time :)

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  5. Hey hey! I liked this. there's always someone who could relate with your poetry. Sadly today writing is losing it's real sense. It's more for popularity and less to comfort or to express. But I really liked your thoughts behind writing this. I hope I too touch the strings of someone's heart by whatever I write.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you :) i'm glad you felt that way.. sadly but so true .. you already write beautifully and have pulled that hope string :)

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  6. Oh wow, such heartbreaking lines, yet oozing with romance and longing and sighs. Well written Ankur!

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  7. Lovely words here, Ankur. Keep it up!
    Many will surely "accompany" you
    "On this wild, drug infested goose chase" :)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you :) i just hope people can feel related :)

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  8. Tangled vibes.........beautiful weave.........awesome poem ... Great!

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  9. Nicely shared and very well weaved in.

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  10. wow!! this touched me more than I could say with words, Ankur....loved every word!

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